如何與難相處的人打交道呢
Dr. Manny Alvarez: Who doesn’t have a difficult colleague, friend, or family member? The bad news, often times, you’re forced to interact with these people on a daily basis and they could have a personality disorder. But the good news is there are simple ways you can learn to deal with their behaviors.
曼尼·阿爾瓦雷斯醫生:誰沒有難相處的同事、朋友或家人呢?壞消息是,人們通常不得不每天和這些人打交道,而他們可能有人格障礙。但好消息是你可以學習一些應對他們行為的簡單方法。
Dr. Andrew Twardon: A person with a paranoid personality is someone who is very much preoccupied with loyalty of other people, uh, it is a person who constantly scans the environment and other people, looking for possible indications or signs of some sort of deception.
安德魯·託登醫生:性格偏執的人非常注重其他人的忠誠,嗯,這類人會不斷地審視環境和其他人以找到某種欺騙的可能跡象或徵兆。
Dr. Alvarez: The solution Dr. Twardon suggests, stick to conversation topics that are safe, and not too personal. Avoid any signs of criticisms or attack, and refrain from using language that is patronizing or condescending.
阿爾瓦雷斯醫生:託登醫生建議的解決方法是:緊緊圍繞“安全”的話題,不要過於涉及私事。避免任何批評或抨擊的'痕跡,不要使用傲慢或有優越感的措辭。
Dr. Twardon: A narcissistic person really believes that she is better than you. And because I am better than you, I am entitled to expect that you do the things for me. I am entitled to be focused exclusively on my own needs and kind of disregard yours.
託登醫生:自戀的人確信她比你優秀。因為我比你優秀,所以我有權讓你為我做事,我有權只注重自己的需要,而有時忽略你的需要。
Dr. Alvarez: So how do you deal with those ego-maniacs? Don’t be defensive with this person; it could trigger a fight, and try to make yourself an important part of his or her world in order to keep up the relationship.
阿爾瓦雷斯醫生:怎樣跟那些自戀狂打交道呢?不用對這種人持防禦姿態,這會引發爭吵,試着讓自己成為他或她的世界裏重要的一員來維持你們的關係。
Dr. Twardon: That is essentially a person who is dealing with a lot of internal…call it insecurity, or internal anxiety, and internal conflicts. And the way of resolving internal conflicts is by organizing the external environment.
託登醫生:本質上來説有一種人在不斷解決很多內在的……叫作不安全感或內在焦慮、內在衝突。他們需要通過使外部環境條理化來解決內在衝突。
Dr. Alvarez: Dr. Twardon is talking about Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which can make others jumpy. Try acknowledging their hard work with compliments, compromise with them when possible, and also avoid conflict. And Dr. Twardon reminds us we all have a little bit of these personalities in ourselves, so treat others as you would like to be treated.
阿爾瓦雷斯醫生:託登醫生説的是會讓其他人膽戰心驚的強迫症。試着用讚美的話來肯定他們的辛勤工作,可能的話對他們妥協,同樣要避免衝突。託登醫生提醒我們:我們自己的性格中都會有一點這些個性,所以要像你希望自己被對待的方式那樣來對待別人。
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